TOP TEN WAYS TO AVOID A SPANKING
( CLICK
HERE for MEMBERS
version )
First , do you really want to ?
Assuming the answer is yes , here are some suggestions. I do not in any way
guarantee them , or recommend them , or even own up to trying them . If any of
them work for you , please let me know .
1. Make him laugh. This usually works, if you can break the mood
enough. At least it might reduce the number or intensity a little.
Try quoting the punchline from his favourite joke, using a silly
voice, whatever usually works.
2. Sex. Men are HIGHLY distractible, especially if sex is introduced
into the action. You might offer to do something that he likes that
you won't usually do, or simply open your legs a little wider when
he's getting you in position. A little wiggle or two, eeeeeasy. In
extreme circumstances, wait until he's just about to begin and then
say, "I've often wondered what anal sex is like." EVERY man will
pause after that.
3. This requires forward planning. A few days before you think you'll
be in trouble (maybe a bill is due, or maybe you just get in trouble
every few days), you take something he'll miss quickly. Something
small and very important to him. The remote is ideal, or his watch,
whatever you know he'll worry about. Keep it hidden. When you know a
spanking is imminent, stash the item where the spanking will take
place. When you're over his knee, you shout, "Look! There's the
remote under the bed!" He'll probably be so pleased to see his long-
lost love that he'll go and check to see if it still works. And
forget to spank you!
(Note: If you can, take something like his wedding ring, something
he's not SUPPOSED to lose ever. He'll be so guilty about losing it he
probably won't tell you. When you `find' it, you'll be the outraged
one and HE'LL be the one in trouble. Brilliant, huh?)
4. Just before he begins, announce your waters have broken and you've
gone into labour. This only works under special circumstances.
5. Gaslight him. Use make-up to make your bottom pink, put on a few
lipstick stripes maybe. Then, when he upends you, say, "But darling,
you spanked me for that yesterday!"
6. Again, just as the action is about to start, yell: "I've left the
iron switched on!" Or the stove, the nuclear reactor, whatever.
Anything to distract him, remember men have short attention spans.
Enough delay and he'll start watching sport on tv, and then you're
safe.
7. Throw up. Disgusting, but it works.
8. If you know you're going to be in trouble in the near future,
invite people to stay. Your parents, his parents, strangers off the
street, anyone. (Unless he's likely to ask them to be the audience,
or unless the parents are likely to join in and help him!)
9. Replace the hairbrush/paddle with a cardboard imitation. This is a
desperate act which never works.
10. When he announces your spanking you say, "How can you do this
today of all days?" When he asks you what's special about
today, "Don't tell me you've forgotten? Doesn't our relationship mean
ANYTHING to you?" Floods of tears follow, and heartbroken
accusations. If you play it well enough, you'll not only miss the
spanking, you'll get a night out or a nice present instead.
When it's all over, if he asks again about the date you tell him it's
the anniversary of the day you first met, or dated, or kissed,
anything at all. He'll never be able to disprove it. Men only
remember times, dates and places if there's a sport involved.
11. Sex. It has been mentioned before, but it's always worth
mentioning again. Not only do you avoid a spanking, but you both have
some fun.
Always assuming you really do want to avoid that spanking.
Continued in the MEMBERS AREA
First, do you really want to?
Assuming the answer is yes, here are some suggestions. I do not in
any way guarantee them, or recommend them, or even own up to trying
them. If any of them work for you, please let me know.
1. Make him laugh. This usually works, if you can break the mood enough. At
least it might reduce the number or intensity a little.
Try quoting the punchline from his favourite joke, using a silly voice, whatever
usually works. Yeah right, and my chances of this actually happening are 1 in a
ZILLION too...
2. Sex. Men are HIGHLY distractible, especially if sex is introduced into the
action. You might offer to do something that he likes that you won't usually do,
or simply open your legs a little wider when he's getting you in position. A
little wiggle or two, eeeeeasy. In
extreme circumstances, wait until he's just about to begin and then say,
"I've often wondered what anal sex is like." EVERY man will pause
after that. And I would be in serious trouble too as sex doesn't
sway his train of thought once he gets focused on things at hand. My butt
generally being the object of his attention at the moment.
3. This requires forward planning. A few days before you think you'll be in
trouble (maybe a bill is due, or maybe you just get in trouble every few days),
you take something he'll miss quickly. Something small and very important to
him. The remote is ideal, or his watch,
whatever you know he'll worry about. Keep it hidden. When you know a spanking is
imminent, stash the item where the spanking will take place. When you're over
his knee, you shout, "Look! There's the remote under the bed!" He'll
probably be so pleased to see his long-lost love that he'll go and check to see
if it still works. And forget to spank you! Sports would be the only thing to
change his mind, and he seems to find smacking my bottom extremely SPORTING on
his part. MEN !!!!
4. Just before he begins, announce your waters have broken and you've gone into
labour. This only works under special circumstances. Oh nooooo...... Not
even a chance with this one as one can't get preggie via long distance telephone
conversations.... LMAO !!!!
5. Gaslight him. Use make-up to make your bottom pink, put on a few lipstick
stripes maybe. Then, when he upends you, say, "But darling, you spanked me
for that yesterday!" Again not a snowballs chance in you know where
would this one take flight. He would simply give me a solid smack and god
forbide that lipstick should smudge cause then it would REALLY be on for SURE
!!!!
6. Again, just as the action is about to start, yell: "I've left the iron
switched on!" Or the stove, the nuclear reactor, whatever.
Anything to distract him, remember men have short attention spans.
Enough delay and he'll start watching sport on tv, and then you're safe.
Nope !!! He's always one step ahead of me there, and makes sure everything else
has been taken care of BEFORE he even starts.
7. Throw up. Disgusting, but it works. NOW THATS AN IDEA !!!!!!! But
would probably get more swats for making a mess... LMAO
8. If you know you're going to be in trouble in the near future, invite people
to stay. Your parents, his parents, strangers off the street, anyone. (Unless
he's likely to ask them to be the audience, or unless the parents are likely to
join in and help him!) Whoever came up with this one needs to be shot!!!!
That would only provide him with more determination, and an invitation to those
in the house... He needs NO ENCOURAGEMENT and does just dandy all on his
lil lonesome !!!!!!
9. Replace the hairbrush/paddle with a cardboard imitation. This is a desperate
act which never works. Maybe if I replaced them with a NURF paddle he
wouldn't notice so quickly. Now thats worth a try!!! ROFLMAO !!!!!!!!!
10. When he announces your spanking you say, "How can you do this today of
all days?" When he asks you what's special about today, "Don't tell me
you've forgotten? Doesn't our relationship mean ANYTHING to you?" Floods of
tears follow, and heartbroken accusations. If you play it well enough, you'll
not only miss the spanking, you'll get a night out or a nice present instead.
When it's all over, if he asks again about the date you tell him it's the
anniversary of the day you first met, or dated, or kissed, anything at all.
He'll never be able to disprove it. Men only remember times, dates and places if
there's a sport involved. Now this one is feasible as he's always talking
about memory, and my attempting to take advantage of his... LMAO !!!!!
11. Sex. It has been mentioned before, but it's always worth mentioning again.
Not only do you avoid a spanking, but you both have some fun. Sometimes I
wish it were an option, but it doesn't always APPLY... DARN IT !!
Always assuming you really do want to avoid that spanking.
3. This requires forward planning. A few days before you think you'll
be in trouble (maybe a bill is due, or maybe you just get in trouble
every few days), you take something he'll miss quickly. Something
small and very important to him. The remote is ideal, or his watch,
whatever you know he'll worry about. Keep it hidden. When you know a
spanking is imminent, stash the item where the spanking will take
place. When you're over his knee, you shout, "Look! There's the
remote under the bed!" He'll probably be so pleased to see his long-
lost love that he'll go and check to see if it still works. And
forget to spank you!
First, do you really want to?
Assuming the answer is yes, here are some suggestions. I do not in
any way guarantee them, or recommend them, or even own up to trying
them. If any of them work for you, please let me know.
1. Make him laugh. This usually works, if you can break the mood enough. At
least it might reduce the number or intensity a little.
Try quoting the punchline from his favourite joke, using a silly voice, whatever
usually works. Yeah right, and my chances of this actually happening are 1 in a
ZILLION too...
2. Sex. Men are HIGHLY distractible, especially if sex is introduced into the
action. You might offer to do something that he likes that you won't usually do,
or simply open your legs a little wider when he's getting you in position. A
little wiggle or two, eeeeeasy. In
extreme circumstances, wait until he's just about to begin and then say,
"I've often wondered what anal sex is like." EVERY man will pause
after that. And I would be in serious trouble too as sex doesn't
sway his train of thought once he gets focused on things at hand. My butt
generally being the object of his attention at the moment.
3. This requires forward planning. A few days before you think you'll be in
trouble (maybe a bill is due, or maybe you just get in trouble every few days),
you take something he'll miss quickly. Something small and very important to
him. The remote is ideal, or his watch,
whatever you know he'll worry about. Keep it hidden. When you know a spanking is
imminent, stash the item where the spanking will take place. When you're over
his knee, you shout, "Look! There's the remote under the bed!" He'll
probably be so pleased to see his long-lost love that he'll go and check to see
if it still works. And forget to spank you! Sports would be the only thing to
change his mind, and he seems to find smacking my bottom extremely SPORTING on
his part. MEN !!!!
4. Just before he begins, announce your waters have broken and you've gone into
labour. This only works under special circumstances. Oh nooooo...... Not
even a chance with this one as one can't get preggie via long distance telephone
conversations.... LMAO !!!!
5. Gaslight him. Use make-up to make your bottom pink, put on a few lipstick
stripes maybe. Then, when he upends you, say, "But darling, you spanked me
for that yesterday!" Again not a snowballs chance in you know where
would this one take flight. He would simply give me a solid smack and god
forbide that lipstick should smudge cause then it would REALLY be on for SURE
!!!!
6. Again, just as the action is about to start, yell: "I've left the iron
switched on!" Or the stove, the nuclear reactor, whatever.
Anything to distract him, remember men have short attention spans.
Enough delay and he'll start watching sport on tv, and then you're safe.
Nope !!! He's always one step ahead of me there, and makes sure everything else
has been taken care of BEFORE he even starts.
7. Throw up. Disgusting, but it works. NOW THATS AN IDEA !!!!!!! But
would probably get more swats for making a mess... LMAO
8. If you know you're going to be in trouble in the near future, invite people
to stay. Your parents, his parents, strangers off the street, anyone. (Unless
he's likely to ask them to be the audience, or unless the parents are likely to
join in and help him!) Whoever came up with this one needs to be shot!!!!
That would only provide him with more determination, and an invitation to those
in the house... He needs NO ENCOURAGEMENT and does just dandy all on his
lil lonesome !!!!!!
9. Replace the hairbrush/paddle with a cardboard imitation. This is a desperate
act which never works. Maybe if I replaced them with a NURF paddle he
wouldn't notice so quickly. Now thats worth a try!!! ROFLMAO !!!!!!!!!
10. When he announces your spanking you say, "How can you do this today of
all days?" When he asks you what's special about today, "Don't tell me
you've forgotten? Doesn't our relationship mean ANYTHING to you?" Floods of
tears follow, and heartbroken accusations. If you play it well enough, you'll
not only miss the spanking, you'll get a night out or a nice present instead.
When it's all over, if he asks again about the date you tell him it's the
anniversary of the day you first met, or dated, or kissed, anything at all.
He'll never be able to disprove it. Men only remember times, dates and places if
there's a sport involved. Now this one is feasible as he's always talking
about memory, and my attempting to take advantage of his... LMAO !!!!!
11. Sex. It has been mentioned before, but it's always worth mentioning again.
Not only do you avoid a spanking, but you both have some fun. Sometimes I
wish it were an option, but it doesn't always APPLY... DARN IT !!
Always assuming you really do want to avoid that spanking.
